I was 9 weeks pregnant when I reported for a routine ultrasound. I had previously miscarried so was feeling extremely anxious about this whole pregnancy, especially ultrasound appointments. Christian reassured me every day that I was worrying for no reason and encouraged me to go about my days as normal. This appointment didn’t go as normal as I nor anyone else was expecting…
One sperm, one egg, one placenta, two sacs, two heartbeats, TWO BABIES!

Infinity sacs
Two sacs forming an infinity symbol

I’d always wanted to be a twin, but not in a million years did I ever thought I would be a twin mum! Life as we know it will never be the same.

Welcome to the world of Kauri and Karaitiana. Perfectly identical boys born 17th January, 2017. The definition of “double trouble”.

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Epsom Floatations Spas

As a new mum, looking deathly tired is the new norm, and an uninterrupted nights sleep is a distant memory. Why did I kid myself into thinking some meditation would be just what I needed.
If ‘futureAlex’ is reading this down the track, here’s a quick recap as to why you’d be better off going for a massage if given the opportunity.
Last minute Friday night I phoned a spa and got a booking almost instantly for an hour. I raced down to Clarendon St clinic and upon arrival scored a mean car park right out the front! (this was all meant to be). I signed my life away, took my room, inserted earplugs, showered and boarded the rocket ship. IMG_3569
It was dark and the music was so peaceful. The floating sensation took me a little while to get used to; my flailing arms were like magnets to the sides. After a few moments of closing my eyes and letting my mind drift, a big fat condensation drop lands on my nose. It gets itchy. Don’t touch your face Alex! I wipe the drip. The water from my hand rolls down my face. Into my eyes. Why did you touch your face Alex!? My eyes are burning. Water makes it way to my mouth. My mouth is burning…
I probably lasted less than five minutes until I flung the door open to grab a towel and wipe my face. Oh, did I mention it’s pitch black and the sensor lights only turn on toward the end of the session.
Round two: By this stage the music has faded and I’m feeling around to close the door like a blind woman. Admittedly my mind was too active so I shifted my focus to my breathing. Before I knew it my mind was thinking of a friends-mothers-friends-daughters-cousin that I saw on instagram and pondering if she gets sore neck and shoulders like I do from breastfeeding. Then I was humming the wiggles. I’m out the fucking gate. Then I’m wondering how much time I’ve killed doing everything that I shouldn’t be doing and how much dollars that equals. And what else I could have spent that money on. Then I’m humming the wiggles again. Then my face is itchy- You get the jist.
My motherly mind is too busy to relax, and I was not in the right headspace to meditate effectively. I did however enjoy the hour and a half I got to myself, even if it did cost $65!

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